The weather has been quite hot these few days, perspiring quite a lot

Left one paper to go on next thurs

Saw Shawn(the winner of the second season the Campus superstar, i think) in Simei a few days ago...my sis says just need to walk around in Simei and will see him one..

Oh ya, my sis also applied for SP...i forgot all about the procedures like the payment methods....its been three years, how to remember?

any more updates, will post it online wif(whenever i'm free)

signing off,
JL

On Friday, 19 of February 2010, something happened which will definitely leave a blank space and an empty mark in my life.

I totaly forgot and missed my RC test which comprised of 20% of the total grades.

I was writing notes for my BTBM when suddenly i received an sms, and upon reading it, got the shock of my life.

I rememebered with a jolt that i was supposed to have a Test at 1pm, and its then 1.30pm.

I hastily changed clothes and rushed down in a taxi and ran all the way to the venue. But it was already too late.

From this incident, i realised that, i finally found a large obstacle in my life that is sufficient to change me, my ways of thinking, my life as a whole...not that other incidents do not, but this is the first time i totally forgot and missed a test. Heard from the lecturer that there is no way i can have a retest.

The only good thing is that i have always been early, if not punctual, for my classes, and that the lecturer had looked thru my other asessments and predicted that i might just fall from an "A" to a "B"..

but this is not the point.

I've been wondering after this incident..that must we really have to experience something significant before we can really change what we know that is wrong, but which we are still doing? Must we realy have to lose something before we will miss it?

I can't blame it on my short-term memory; either can i blame it on any other person or things except myself.


In the past, i've always have these wierd thoughts of "what if this happens to me? what if that hapens to me? how will i handle it?..."

Now that these thoughts became a reality...i find it hard to accept it..

however, life has to move on...and i know that if i just stand that, blaming myself, feeling depressed, or even hating what has happened...without the thought of moving on..i cannot survive in this world..

Sure, all of us had heard of peple who have experienced worse but bcame successful in the end, and i found myself asking this question:

" Why is being a human so diffecult and complicated and stressful?"

"Is education really the most important thing in this world"

"Are we really so dependent on education that we cannot survive without it?"

I know that i've only missed one test and should not exaggerate thing, but.. do we need to really make ourselves so stressful and make our lives so dificult just to get a good education so that we can survive in this world?

I know that stress does not come naturally but is what we create ourselves but this does not help in answering my questions.

I just want to make it clear that i am one who takes each test seriously,

and not one who thinks " chey, just 20%, nevermind la..miss miss lor!!"

or "Ha! just need MC rite? buy one la!! then can retest lalala"

Thus comes my next question:

" do we need to really use all kinds of unethical methods like lying or using fake smiles or whatever just to survive in this world, as long as we do not break any law??"

I know to survive in this world, the most important thing is that we should first care for our own selves because if there's really anytihng that happen to you, NO ONE will care for you if they cannot even care for themselves. YOU WILL JUST HAVE TO USE ALL KINDS OF MEANS JUST TO SURVIVE AND FIGHT ON.

In this world, if you do not even care for yourself in the first place, no one will help you.

I've seen how some people work in some places..i've seen how selfish and realistic this world can be...

but i just cannot come to terms with it...!

I hope one day, i do not need to use any underhand means or even outright means or whatever just to survive...But i know.

That the chance of this day coming. Is not even close to zero.

Signing off,
JL

Happy Lunar New Year to all!

Its been quite a hectic week..

didn't even sleep much last night...was copying notes, then slp for like 20 mins then repeat....until 3 plus then slp until 6 then repeat the procedure until
7.45am......

today got CSB meeting role-play and MMIT "open book" test (more like closed book than open book)

totally forgot to read the case study which was given to us like eons ago...and only managed to borrow from a friend and photocopy 5mins before the test....

and not enough time too - - can't finish 2 whole qns...veri emo....

role-play was better, the teacher said it was "veri good"..

then managed to submit my applications for NUS and NTU and paid application fee, all in one day. With help from Wiliam Swee. Feel that must give credit or else duno what will happen to me...lol jk.

NUS application already submitted a few days ago.


so now just need to study for two exams can le

dun like the word "study", prefer " take notes and read and memorise"..more friendly that way.


Signing off,
JL

I have really failed as a friend when i did not even know my friends are suffering until they told me themselves.

I take this opportunity to offer my most sincere apologies and deepest regrets.

Why had i not noticed earlier?

I mean
Why is this world so practical?

Being drprived of our responsibilities and then using that as a weapon to attack us..

yes, the results are important, but f**king wrong are you to think that you can just dun like us do what we can and then say we did not do at all..

I agree sometimes we are not really good at doin some things, but you do not have to put everything on yourself and prevent us from doin what we should be
doing, then turn around and shoot us.

You think you are right, but you are not at all.

What is the meaning of a "team" when only a few persons are doing and the rest are deprived the means to help, and when they tried to, they received negative comments, when in the first place, you isolate them n did not tell them what you are doin...

Why must the world become like this?

Is this how things work in this world?

Why is the world so crooked and practical?

Why is the world changing , or deteriorating?

Why must some people think or act this way just because they are better?

Academic qualifications are useless and trash if you do not have the right mindset or consideration for others.

If you are being plain selfish and only think of getting good results, you FAIL. as a person. as a friend. as a human.

I wil not be getting into the specifics about what happened due to a promise and confidentiality.

Pls do not even try to guess what happened. or spread anything around.

It can happen a few years ago, or even just some kind of recollection during my primary or secondary school years or even as a kind of general thinking about this damn place we call earth.

I sincerely hope tat this thing will only be discussed within the boundaries of this blog.

Earth is ok. Good even. But the people who lives in it..that's another thing.

Ok. I shall focus on my exams first and not be distracted by other things of the past.

I WILL BECOME A BETTER PERSON, A BETTER FRIEND!


Signing off,
JL

I just realised i did not sign out from my blog since the last time i signed in.
.

AAAhghgghghghghghghggghggghhhhhhh...!!!

ok.

so.

Finished CSB Minutes test and RC Role-play yesterday.

BD final report submission is after Exams

BMG report submission tml, but only need two pages and my leader is doin it cos i tink she dun nid much help tt's why she did not ask for any.

MMIT report by this friday but i did my part for the report plus appendices and references and emailed them le.

CSB Meeting Role-play is not until next Tuesday, and haven receive any news from my group yet.

so now...

just downloaded past years papers for my two modules (I only has two modules for exams)

and cleaned up my desktop icons so only a few remain to be seen on the desktop.

basically just waiting now..

and maybe find some info for the CSB role-play.

decided to just let my workers in my Restaurant in Resaurant city work to death. then giv them some items to recover work time everytime i log in.

found a new application called "Crazy Planets" quite nice to play.

Still on Castle Age and Yakuza Lords.

Started a new blog.

address can be found in my Facebook profile.

Til then

Signing off,
JL

Finally! I'm 99.9% away from RC CA completion

Just need to:
- Buy 2 folders
- Buy 1 empty CD
- Design CD cover
- Put everything into the CD
- Fold Brochure

I practicaly "ate" off a whole lot of ink (and colored one at that) in the Retail Studio....

Printed ad printed and printed like there's no tomorrow...so much for the environment-conscious side of me..

anyway now have some free time bfore i do all those things at the top

today had MMIT phase 2 presentation...we exceeded our time limit by round 5+ minutes

but we did our best, with one member less (as she had some personal problems)than the other groups

till next post then

Signing off,
JL

These few days too manyt things to do le.... too many tests le.....

And now doin some press release thing which i seriously have no idea how to do...

MMIT, RC, LERM, CSB, BD.....

How i wish i could use Kage bunshin no jutsu....

anyway, i'm currently onto Naruto manga, but had only passed episode 100+...

next week is gonna be like hell for me...

But i will not be beaten, at most only to a pulp..

till next time then

Signing off,
Jl